Confession time: I’m not much of a fisherman.

In fact, the one and only time I’ve ever been fishing was back when I was a kid, and my dad took me to the local lake down the road. He set me up with my rod and my bait, and when I went to cast my line out into the lake… I somehow hit the rod on the hill behind me, and then I proceeded to LAUNCH most of my fishing rod out into the middle of the lake.

My dad ran over and frantically tried reeling the rod back in, but it was a lost cause. And so… we went home defeated. And I never really tried to fish ever again.

This is actually part of my theory as to why Jesus ultimately called me to the priesthood… He was like: Ok, so… you’re terrible at fishing for fish…

So I think I’ll make you a fisher of men!

This is kind of a silly story — but I think it speaks to something profound that the Lord so often does in our lives.

Jesus meets us wherever we are weak. Wherever we have failed… Wherever we feel completely and utterly UNWORTHY… and THAT’S precisely when and where He calls us out into deeper, unexpected waters.

In our Gospel today, Jesus told Peter — who I might add, ALSO failed miserably at fishing. All the stories we have of Peter, who is a PROFESSIONAL FISHERMAN, involve him NOT being able to catch any fish …And so Jesus tells him: “Put out into deep water and lower your nets for a catch.”

And you have to imagine: Peter probably felt pretty dejected at this point, probably really tired and worn out… He must have felt like a TERRIBLE fisherman… and totally, completely UNWORTHY… 

But, when Jesus tells him to do it, he lowers his nets in obedience, and BAM…. That’s when the miracle happens! THAT’S when they catch an INSANE number of fish, so many in fact that “their nets were tearing” we hear!

What’s Peter’s response to the miracle???

He drops to his knees in front of Jesus and he says: “Depart from me, Lord, for I am a sinful man!” 

Depart from me! I am UNWORTHY…

This is just like the prophet Isaiah in our first reading, who had that overwhelming vision of the Lord in Heaven — he heard those holiest of angels, the blessed Seraphim, singing back and forth to each other, the same song we sing at every Mass: “Holy, holy, holy is the LORD of hosts! All the earth is filled with his glory!”

Isaiah recoils in fear — “Woe is me, I am doomed! For I am a man of unclean lips!”

Leave me, Lord! Look away from me! I’m SO UNWORTHY of this… so UNWORTHY to be part of something so miraculous…so amazing….so beautiful!!!!

We do this in our lives all the time, don’t we? We experience exactly what Isaiah and Peter are putting into words:

“Lord, I am not worthy.”

And to be clear — it’s a VERY good thing to start with this. In fact, it’s essential. We say that every single time we are about to receive the Most Blessed Sacrament. After singing the Lamb of God — when Jesus is right here with us, just like He was there in that boat with Peter — and we drop down to OUR knees, in front of Jesus — and what do we say? We say: “Lord, I’m not worthy.”

GOOD. That is true!

There’s so much truth to that!!!  …In fact, more truth than we can possibly ever imagine.

Dr. Mary Healy puts our situation this way, and I love this: “It is way worse than you think. (Our unworthiness) Your problem is way worse than you think.”

In other words — We are WAY MORE UNWORTHY than we could ever really actually imagine…  In fact, it is the mercy of God that we do not experience our actual unworthiness compared to the ALL-WORTHY, THRICE HOLY GOD. It is an act of tender mercy from our Lord.

“BUT…” she says… even though things are way worse than you think Dr Mary Healy then says: “God’s solution is way better than we think, too.” 

Because here’s the deal:

God takes care of our unworthiness perfectly. Through the Precious Blood of Jesus His Son, He makes up for ALL our shortcomings. The Blood that was shed for us on the Cross is like that scorching, burning coal that the angel brings down and purifies Isaiah’s lips with… saying: “”See, now that this has touched your lips, your wickedness is removed, your sin purged.”

IT’S GONE… He dealt with our unworthiness on the Cross. Jesus does not expect you to be worthy… He expects you to repent.

And that gives us freedom. That gives us a lot of peace! That gives us the freedom to BE UNWORTHY in the presence of God, who is the ONLY worthy One. He ALONE is worthy.

THANK GOD WE ARE SO UNWORTHY.

In fact — and this is often hard for us to accept and actually quite frustrating perhaps if you’ve ever come face to face with your own unworthiness: 

God actually seems to REALLY enjoy working through our unworthiness.

It seems a little bit backwards to us, doesn’t it?

We kind of assume that because we are unworthy, then God would rather pick someone else to do His work… somebody else to be His instrument! Somebody more knowledgable, more successful, more obviously gifted and competent than us! Someone who WON’T launch the fishing rod out into the middle of the lake…

You know, we think these more capable people are the ones He chooses for the most important missions! Those are the people He calls to be priests and nuns! Those are the people who are gonna do something actually important for the Church…

But… it actually tends to be just the opposite!

I was just listening to a podcast recently called ‘Restore the Glory.’ And a priest was on there — his name is Fr Matthias Thelen — and he shared this amazing story about a blind woman he met once who had gotten into some sort of car accident and was now living on the streets. So Fr Matthias and his friends had brought her to a church, got her some new clothes and food, and they were about to put her up in a hotel for the night… when Fr Matthias turned to her and said: “Can I pray for you?” 

She said: Absolutely! So he put his hand on the back of her head, and he said he felt totally powerless… powerless in the face of the suffering this woman was going through, her blindness…And all he did was pray: “Lord, please heal her,” tracing the sign of the Cross on the back of her head.

And at that moment, the woman jumped up saying: “What’d you just do?” 

“I was just praying.” He replied.

“Praying for what?” 

“That you could see.”

“I felt electricity coming from your fingers and into my eyes.” 

Then she suddenly started screaming: “I can see!” She started praising God right there in the church. Her eyes were physically healed.

And as amazing as that is… here’s the part of the story I want to draw attention to is Fr Matthias’s response… Because when this happened, he said, everyone else was like: “Wow she’s healed! She’s healed! That’s amazing!” The person who had the hardest time actually believing this actually happened…  was himself.

Why?

“Because,” he said, “I knew my sin. I knew how broken I was. I knew how often I had to go to confession. And I didn’t think God would do something like that through someone like me.” 

He was disqualifying himself! He was focusing so much on his unworthiness that he couldn’t believe God would perform a miracle through him. Just like Peter in that boat, after a miraculous catch of fish: “Lord, depart from me… I am a sinful man. You shouldn’t do miracles through me. I’m too unworthy.”

But later on, and this is so huge: He realized something in prayer: None of this was about him. God’s healing had literally nothing to do with him other than the fact that he gave God a little bit of availability, and he had that little mustard seed of faith to pray for that person.

But the results had NOTHING to do with “his” worthiness… It was about the Worthiness of JESUS. It wasn’t about “Father Matthias” being good, it was about God being Good!!! It wasn’t about “Fr Matthias” being made known or getting any attention, it was ALL about the Lord being made known.

“Now this is eternal life,” Jesus says, “that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent.”

BOOM….

It’s all about God. It’s all about making Him more known and loved. It’s His idea to work through you… not yours. He chose you! Unworthy as you may be… And so we rejoice in that.

As St Paul says elsewhere: “God chose the foolish of the world to shame the wise, and God chose the weak of the world to shame the strong.”

If you know you’re weak and unworthy, that actually makes you the PERFECT instrument for God to work through!

There’s a really great scene in the Chronicles of Narnia, where Aslan asks Prince Caspian a question: “Do you feel yourself sufficient to take up the Kingship of Narnia?”

And I love Caspian’s response. He says: “I — I don’t think I do, Sir. I’m only a kid.”

And Aslan responds: “Good!” — “If you had felt yourself sufficient, it would have been proof that you were not.”

If you’re unworthy, and if you know that you’re unworthy — and that it’s not about you — that is proof right there that God wants to do incredible things through you…

Jesus is taking you, right now into deep waters.

So let Him do that.

Don’t resist Him. Don’t disqualify yourself! Be more like St Paul, who in that second reading who said, almost like it was a badge of honor: “I am the least of the apostles, not fit to be called an apostle!” Why? Because he persecuted Christians! And yet GOD CHOSE ME… “I am what I am by the grace of God!” Who cares if I’m unworthy? It’s all about God and His worthiness.

So it’s no use trying to avoid the Lord saying: “You got the wrong guy”

No… you ARE the guy.

You ARE the girl.

Jesus says to you right now: “Do not be afraid. I have a mission for you. Follow me…. as unworthy as you are… I am MAKING you worthy.”