Something I’ve been hearing a lot more of lately in modern internet slang is something people call “Main Character Syndrome” …or the slightly less pejorative term “Main Character Energy.”

Even if you’re not familiar with this terminology, I think the basic concept is really easy for us all to grasp.

We’ve all watched movies, right?

When you watch a movie, you immediately get a sense for which characters are “main characters” and which ones aren’t, right? 

Luke Skywalker — Main character

Anna and Elsa — Main characters

Tony Stark — Main character

We quickly learn which characters are crucial to the story, and which ones are kind of dispensable. 

When you’re watching a Jurassic Park movie… this translates to: Which characters have a decent chance of surviving to the end of the film, and which ones are totally gonna get eaten.

Someone who has “Main Character Syndrome” is a person who actually believes that THEY are in fact the central character to the story… that in fact we’re all living in THEIR Jurassic Park movie, and we’re just the poor extras that are totally gonna get EATEN by the T-Rex!

Why am I bringing all of this up in a homily, you may ask?

Well, because I think this “Main Character Syndrome” is a very serious issue in our day and age. More and more people seem to be suffering from something like it. Social media has only exacerbated things to an unsustainable level. More and more people appear to be operating in their own little worlds, isolated and anxious over their accumulation of likes, subscribers, and notifications… as if this entire show, the whole of reality — is somehow all about them.

“All the world’s a stage” as Shakespeare once put it… and the person with Main Character Syndrome believes that you are their personal audience.

Which brings us to our gospel today, where Jesus drops some serious humility bombs on this dinner party he is invited to:

“When you are invited by someone to a wedding banquet, do not recline at table in the place of honor. A more distinguished guest than you may have been invited by him, and the host who invited both of you may approach you and say, ‘Give your place to this man,’ and then you would proceed with embarrassment to take the lowest place.”

In other words, Jesus is warning those who are carefully picking the highest places of honor at the table:

“So you think you’re the main characters, huh? You really think that you’re just surrounded by a bunch of npc’s — mindless, dispensable, pre-programmed non-playing-characters in this video game life of yours? Well, be very careful! You may be in for a rude awakening! Someone much more important than you may come to this party… (Ahem… in fact, something GREATER than Solomon, something even GREATER than the Temple itself is here speaking with you right now!) or is that so hard to imagine?”

“Rather, when you are invited,” Jesus continues in the Scripture: “go and take the lowest place so that when the host comes to you he may say, ‘My friend, move up to a higher position.’ Then you will enjoy the esteem of your companions at the table. For every one who exalts himself will be humbled, but the one who humbles himself will be exalted.”

That’s the big lesson for today:

Every one who exalts himself will be humbled, but the one who humbles himself will be exalted.

Call it main character syndrome if you want, but the Christian tradition has another, more ancient name for “exalting oneself”

…Pride.

St. Thomas Aquinas teaches us that pride is that vice which disposes people to make themselves more than what they actually are. …We might even say: When a person makes themselves into the “main character!”

CS Lewis describes pride as a “spiritual cancer” that “eats up the very possibility of love, or contentment, or even common sense.” It is always comparing, always competing, always puffing itself up, always insecurely angling for more and more attention and praise.

Fr Mike Schmitz defines pride as the “excessive love of one’s own excellence.”

I like that one, but we need to be clear:

Striving for excellence is a GOOD thing — Afterall, just last Sunday we heard Jesus say in the Gospel: “STRIVE TO ENTER THROUGH THE NARROW DOOR!”

The pursuit of excellence and accomplishments, the sincere desire to grow in holiness and even to receive AMAZING gifts from God — these things are not automatically prideful!

Perhaps we need a good definition of humility in order to hopefully clarify all this… Because as St Augustine once said:

“The way to Christ is first through humility, second through humility, and third through humility.”

But humility is very misunderstood today. When we think about being “humble,” we sometimes think that it involves putting ourselves down… belittling ourselves. Never allowing anyone to compliment us. Never accepting praise or recognition…

But this is not humility. As CS Lewis says:

“Humility is not about thinking less of ourselves, but thinking about ourselves less!”

That is a much different vision of humility, isn’t it?

Humility at the end of the day is simply seeing reality, seeing ourselves and seeing everyone else precisely as God sees them. It is the virtue of not thinking too highly… or too lowly of ourselves.

To be humble, therefore, is to live in the Truth.

So, how do we become humble like this and kill off any delusional “main character syndrome” that we might still have in our hearts?

I’ve got 5 ways for us to grow in humility:

  1. Admit that you are proud

If that statement stings… if you kind of recoil from it or instinctively object and say “Ouch, Father, that really hurts me! That offends me”… Well then you’re probably VERY VERY proud!!! But the fact of the matter is, pride is the root of all sin. It was the very first sin. And every single sin committed ever since has at least some amount of pride laced through it. So that’s gotta be the first step: Admit that we are actually still struggling with pride.

  1. Intentionally praise others

We need to build others up. Point away from ourselves! Celebrate other people’s accomplishments! Honor others before seeking honor ourselves.

Think of the person you are kind of jealous of — kind of envious of — and then spend some time identifying and naming the amazing gifts and talents they have!

Praising other people takes NOTHING away from us. It doesn’t diminish you to build other people up. The litany of humility says this: “That others may be praised and I go unnoticed, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.” 

We can ask God for the grace to praise others generously, to honor their gifts, and to lift them up without feeling threatened or lessened ourselves when we go unnoticed!

  1. Surrender control

Pride says… I’m in control. Pride says… I can make stuff happen the way I want it all to happen.

To bring up “Jurassic Park” again, this was the fundamental problem, right? — All the scientists and businessmen had become so blinded by their own pride that they thought they could control the dinosaurs!!!

But as the book of Proverbs aptly puts it: “Pride comes before the fall.”

Humility, on the other hand, says: “Let it be done unto me according to Thy word.” This is the Blessed Mother’s perfectly humble posture: Total receptivity. Total surrender of ALL control over to God. A humble person is able to say without fear: “I don’t always know what I’m doing, but God does, and that is enough for me.”

  1. Focus on Gratitude

We have so many things that we didn’t ask for, didn’t deserve, and that we take for granted.

To become humble, we need to focus on gratitude.

This is not easy. It takes work. Because if we wait around until we feel super thankful, we probably will never actually give thanks. 

So make sure it happens. Get out a sheet of paper. Physically write down ALL the things you are grateful for. Start with the absolute basics. Thank God for the fact that you woke up today. For your morning cup of coffee. For your eyesight, your hearing. For the birds flying outside your window. For the PERFECT weather we’ve been having this past week…just FOCUS on gratitude.

  1. Remember that God is the actual Main Character

Humility is knowing fully well that we are not the center of the universe.

It’s an acknowledgement that we are NOT the protagonist, even of our own lives! Yes, you’re part of a story… an AMAZING story at that! And God has an indispensable role for you to play in this story:

But actually, the main character is and always HAS been… God.

The main character of YOUR life… of MY life… of the Church… of your job… your family… your school…. of this entire world… 

Is Jesus.

It’s all about Jesus.

Contrary to those billboards you might have seen around town: JESUS IS ACTUALLY GOD.

And therefore, He is the only one who actually has the right and privilege to choose the first place… to take the seat of honor… to exalt himself!

But what does He choose to do instead?

He chooses the lowest place.

He puts Himself last.

He becomes a servant to all.

He washes feet.

He eats and drinks with the outcasts and the sinners.

He goes to the sick and the lame and the blind instead of the strong and the rich and the powerful…

He silently allows us to strip him and crucify him. He dies on a cross while most of the world doesn’t even notice — He suffers the ugliest kind of death a person could ever die…

Even today, He continues to lower himself so insanely low…He humbles himself so much… that Bread and Wine now become His Precious Body and Blood.

That’s where the Main Character chooses to reveal Himself:

Inside of that Tabernacle, and every Tabernacle: He humbly, silently waits for us to finally respond to His unconditional love.

…WHY?

Because “Every one who exalts himself will be humbled, but the one who humbles himself will be exalted.”

Risen Jesus, meek and humble of Heart… make us humble like you. 

Kill our pride.

We are not the main characters.

You are.